


So Much For Going Slow

by celli



Category: Crooked Media RPF
Genre: M/M, Star Wars References, The Princess Bride References, Weddings, Yuletide 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:56:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21893449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celli/pseuds/celli
Summary: Jon Lovett @jonlovett Nov 26I’d like a wedding package that includes Domino’s and an escape room and I’m going to be very involved on flowers and passed apps.
Relationships: Jon Favreau & Jon Lovett & Tommy Vietor, Ronan Farrow/Jon Lovett
Comments: 9
Kudos: 79
Collections: Yuletide 2019





	So Much For Going Slow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sweetillusion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetillusion/gifts).

> Thanks to my fantastic betas and everyone who cheered me along while writing this!

Jon Lovett looked around his wedding and took a nervous breath. Everything seemed fine on the surface, but some instinct was screaming at him that something was very, very wrong.

He took it all in, bit by bit. Beautiful sparkling sand all the way to the beautiful sparkling sea? Check, courtesy of one of Mia’s many “old family friends,” this one with an estate in Malibu. White wooden chairs stretching back for far too many rows for Jon’s personal comfort? Check, thanks to an out-of-control guest list. Friends and ”friends” ranging from Oscar winners to Crooked's first interns were out there, staring at him. He smiled weakly back.

He looked from Favs, Tommy, and Spencer at his side, along with Pundit in her little white bow tie, over to his family in the front row. He was so flustered he couldn’t remember how he’d gotten to the front of the crowd, but - oh, thank God, there was Ronan, headed his way on Mia’s arm. Everything would be okay now.

Finally, finally, finally, Ronan was standing next to him. “Hi,” Jon said, breathless with - with everything. “You look amazing.” He did, in a gray suit and a blue tie that matched his eyes.

“So do you,” Ronan said. Jon didn’t roll his eyes because he knew that, for Ronan, it was the truth. “Are you ready, Jonathan?”

Jon opened his mouth to say yes, but what came out was, “What is that _noise_?”

The entire wedding party looked up at the helicopters.

“When did the _National Enquirer_ get branded helicopters?” Favs yelled.

“Plural?” Tommy shouted.

“Incoming!” someone else screamed.

Lovett crouched, clutching at Ronan, and--

\--sat up straight in bed, gasping.

It was fourteen days before the wedding, no tabloid helicopters had yet been sighted, and Jon's nightmares were growing steadily worse.

Ronan stirred next to Jon in bed. “Another one?” he murmured, running a hand up Jon’s back. 

“_National Enquirer_ helicopters divebombing our giant celebrity wedding in Malibu,” Jon said with a half-laugh, scrubbing a hand across his face. Pundit was making distressed noises in the corner; Jon tried to calm his breathing so he wouldn’t worry her.

There was a long pause. “That’s gonna show up in my daymares now, thank you,” Ronan said.

“Right?”

Another pause. “_Malibu_?”

Jon turned to stare over his shoulder. “That’s what you’re hung up on? Not tabloid helicopters or a red-carpet guest list, but _Malibu_? Too déclassée for you?”

“I want our house with our backyard and our guest list,” Ronan said.

“I want Domino’s and an escape room,” Jon said, to his knees.

“Jonathan,” Ronan said in his Serious Reporter Voice, “I get the very strong impression that that stopped being a joke a while ago. Do you want to talk about it?”

Jon thought of the people with plane tickets, the deposits for everything, the way Ronan had looked at him even in the worst of the dreams. “No, I don’t think so,” he said. “I just want to fast-forward through the next two weeks and get to the part where we’re saying beautiful things to each other and then celebrating with people we love.”

“That sounds like the best description of a wedding ever,” Ronan said, pulling Jon back down to curl up with him. “I can’t wait for that part either.”

“I bet you have your beautiful things already written,” Jon said into Ronan’s shoulder.

“An embarrassingly long time ago.”

Jon smiled and tried to get his shoulders to relax.

* * *

“And finally, Pod Save America is brought to you by the Cash App. Insert wedding joke here--”

“I have precisely zero wedding jokes left in my fucking quiver,” Jon said, staring at his microphone so hard his eyes crossed.

“Okay,” Favs said slowly. Out of his peripheral vision, Jon could see Tommy turn to face him, probably looking concerned. 

Jon couldn’t take concerned right now. “I mean, what part of weddings are funny? Wrangling even a few dozen of your nearest and dearest, all of whom develop immediate conflicts with whichever date you choose on whichever date you choose it? Paying people you’ve never met to take care of details you don’t care about? Or, and I could handle the other two without this, being at your absolute most vulnerable in front of a bunch of people, _some of whom are recording you_?”

“You love talking to people. Being in front of people,” Tommy said.

“Not when - I can’t expose my heart like this in front of people,” Jon said despairingly. “And I can’t do anything less in front of Ronan.”

“Can I make a suggestion?” Favs asked.

“Is it ‘Talk to Ronan’?” Jon asked. “Because I think I figured that out already.”

“Also that, but mostly I was going to suggest we start at the top of the ad,” Favs said. 

Jon looked sideways at him and Favs was giving him a sympathetic look, so Jon decided not to kill him in his sleep.

* * *

The guests began arriving on the promised day to find the backyard already set up for the dancing part instead of the wedding part. They milled around, conferring in confused tones, while Jon and Ronan waited in the house. Pundit seemed to have caught Jon’s nerves a bit and was running in circles around them. Ronan was in a gray suit with a tie that matched his eyes; Jon was in jeans and a suit jacket a few shades darker than Ronan’s, his tie already left behind. Their matching wedding bands kept catching Jon’s eye; he reached for Ronan’s hand and ran his thumb over it.

Ronan smiled. “See? This is a good thing.”

“No, totally the right thing,” Jon said, “but telling people, that’s - okay, a fraction as nerve-wracking, but still, my nerves, they’re wracked.”

“It’ll be fine,” Ronan said. “Also, I’m enjoying this spell of being the chill one in the relationship, just so you know.”

“You’re an asshole,” Jon said.

“I know,” Ronan said.

“I love you,” Jon said.

“I know,” Ronan said.

Favs opened the sliding glass door and stuck his head in. “There are a lot of people wondering what the fuck, guys, just letting you know.”

“Why can’t people wait for things, for fuck’s sake,” Jon said.

“Not sure you have a leg to stand on today,” Ronan told him.

“Asshole,” Jon muttered.

“I love you too,” Ronan said.

“All right, let’s do this,” Jon said.

They made their way past Favs and stood at the front of the reception space.

“I’m sure some of you are a bit confused,” Ronan began, “but Jonathan and I went down to the courthouse this morning with a couple of witnesses and made our vows there.”

The crowd noise got really loud; they waited it out.

“Some of us got stage fright,” Jon said, pointing at himself.

“_Both_ of us,” Ronan said, grabbing Jon’s hand, “wanted our wedding to be just right for the two of us and our reception just right for all of us.”

“Sorry for jumping the gun,” Jon said, “but I - um.” Ronan leaned their shoulders together. “I wanted the freedom to say all the things I was feeling, and for once I needed to say them to as few people as possible. I said them to the most important person, anyway, which is what matters.” The crowd broke out in spontaneous “aww”s, and Jon ducked his head, flushing.

“Anyway," Ronan said, though when Jon peeked he was blushing himself, “this is the part where we all celebrate, so thank you so much for coming and for rolling with the changes! Are you ready to toast the smallest wedding with the largest party?”

The crowd cheered. Jon laughed.

Over the speakers, Billie Holiday started singing, and Ronan turned to Jon. “May I have this dance, Jonathan?”

“As you wish,” Jon said, and took his hand.


End file.
